Coaching style

Can't believe it has been so long since my last post. I have been really busy. Just want to make a quick post about coaching with others.

I work with about four other guys with the indoor sport complex and Texas Stars S. C. I have been a fill-in coach for the others who have been with the club and have teams. If adults show up for personal training I take care of them. Soon I might be appointed to a team. It has been a long time since I have taken such responsibility. I walked away from coaching eleven years ago. Besides getting married and having kids, I also had burn out.

This time I have a different set of motivations, perhaps more external ones, like saving money on my own kids fees, and just knowing that the players can benefit greatly from me. When I was in my twenties it was more about the glory. Now taking such leadership roles at age forty is less prestigious and more just natural occurrence. I still was a competitive player then as well. Now I seem to be able to focus less on myself and more on the youths.

I enjoy the sharing with the other coaches. They are good men most with children playing as well. We are all from totally different walks of life but have our love of the game in common. I feel respected among them. That is important to maintain and I must return it and conduct myself professionally at all times.

Differences in styles is apparent. I may not be comfortable with what one coach is doing, saying, or focusing but regardless I always go with the flow if they are leading practice. If I have ideas I must share them tactfully and with relevance to their agenda.

I only have a D license but I was on my way to a C when I quit. I have been trained unofficially by others that have coached professionally in England, Mexico, Iran, and Argentina. I have learned some things from guys with World Cup experience. On my own I am an avid student of training techniques. I believe I am a strong addition but I know my weakness.

For one, I have no management skills. I have to have someone to handle paperwork, money, communication, scheduling. I have to have a 'uber' manager. Plus I have to have a plan, I can't run practices off the cuff. It stresses me out if I don't already know exactly what I am going to do. I don't like lines, or any kind of standing around. I don't like to talk alot. I don't like to yell. At games I believe my role is very limited, like a teacher administering a state exam. I can sub, move players around, advise on the sideline, break it down at halftime, but beyond that I become a distraction. My greatest power is positivity. Once I get negative I need to dismiss myself. My players will feed on it real quick and some will choke on it. If you see me at a game I am most likely sitting down with a clipboard making notes toward what we will work on in the next practice. Some parents and other coaches may see my silence at times as a weakness but most coaches who are loud, are just that-- loud. They don't realize that after awhile there players tune them out. I like to think that when I talk my players hear me deeply. Usually, I rather hear the players talk and help them figure out things for themselves.

Patience might be a problem for me. But as long as I come with a good plan my patience doesn't get so depleted.

Some of my techniques build off the 3v1/5v2, and I often work in grids. I like scrimmages with restrictions that focus on possession. I like players to get the maximum touches on the ball.

Avoiding Burn-Out

My son was in a college camp this week, hosted by the FC Dallas Youth Club, for which he also plays. Its the third one we have been to this year. He has had a lot of soccer and sun lately. Not only is the rigor wearing him down but also the heat. Politics and the constant pressure to perform can lead a young player toward burnout.

I understand this pretty well. I burned out my senior year in high school and quit playing club. I was holding down a job and taking honors classes. I wanted to date a little also. As much as it would help, I haven't made my son get a job. He is wavering about it himself. He needs money.

My son also has a second interest, skateboarding. None of his close hangout buddies are soccer players. All of them are skaters and pretty good students. Some of them have jobs and cars also and are forever picking him up. He also has a girlfriend now. His best friend has a steady, too. I guess it is just that time. Friends are important and I would never put him in a situation where he would have to chose between them or pleasing me. I would deservedly lose in the end.

Even though he did not say it to me out loud, I could tell he did not want to do this college clinic. And in 110 degree weather, at that!

On day one of the clinic I didn't discuss it with him. I just said, "Get in the car." He didn't give me so much as a sigh, but I heard from his mom how he felt. I knew he would rather hang out with his friends, skate, play video games in the AC, and chill with his girlfriend. But I knew once he got out there he would get in game mode and appreciate being around all the elite players and different coaches. And he did. But the last day, last session scrimmage, in the 5pm heat, I knew he was dreading. He actually let me know it and that is not his style. So I called his girlfriend and asked her if she would like to come out with us to this last session. I figured that is the person he had really been wanting to see the last three days and why not just bring her to him.

I know, I considered the distraction, but remember I was a player myself, and had lots of girlfriends out at my games. They didn't effect my play in any way. I appreciated their support. And really, anything short of her lifting her shirt would not pose much of a distraction.

I was pretty sure my son's friend would behave herself. In fact, her presence made the hot afternoon a lot more pleasant. We giggled at her fair complexion and stopped to get her sun screen, telling her to put on one coat now, let it dry, and put on the second coat when we get there. I presented her with an umbrella with the quip, "Sorry, I couldn't find the Hello Kitty one." I got to know her a little and enjoy her and my son's interaction. I thanked her for coming and told her that he needed her support. She said she and some other friends of his have been meaning to make some of his games. He played well and got to show his friend what another side of his life is like.

It's all about balance. In college most of my hang out buddies were not soccer players. I had a very active life outside of soccer. Sometimes I just needed a break from soccer. My friends one time told me they didn't like me as much during soccer season. I guess I was more aggressive or something.

Monitor your athletes' battle fatigue and recruit some reinforcing support. It's not easy out there on that field and not always fun. My son is not just my son, he is also someone else's brother, grandson, friend, boyfriend, skatebuddy, nephew, student, etc. I have to share him and let him share himself. I also think this is the last college camp we'll do. We'll just do some campus visiting from here on out. Unless he says otherwise.

Staying In Shape

Me 30 lbs and three knee surgeries ago. At 40 I believe I can get back to something near that. Dads have to stay in shape. We are too important and the family needs us in the game wearing the captain's arm band. Do you want to perform the best you can for them? How much more time before your role is not so needed? Make it count.
I cut my sugar intake and soccer train. I got up to 205 lbs and now I am back down to 185 and dropping. I use various Coerver Method techniques, Brazilian circuit, plyometrics (if the knees are up for it), and stuff I just make up with a bunch of cones and a big brick wall. I keep moving for 30 minutes and more. I work in some situps and pushups of course. I love to do a lot with the ball. I hate just jogging around the neighborhood and as a matter of fact jogging is adverse conditioning for a soccer player. A soccer player is quick, agile, and must recuperate fast after every run. Lot of changes in speed, stopping, cutting, jumping, sliding, tumbling. Jogging actually slows a soccer player's condition. Jogging certainly doesn't cover the muscle sets involved in playing soccer. I am playing coed with the wife and I feel safer as I play. Also everyone says I rock out there.

The Beautiful Game on two levels

You may have heard the term “Joga Bonita” in reference to soccer. It means “the Beautiful Game.” It is, on one level, referring to the graceful skills needed for the world’s most popular sport. The fancy footwork of Ronaldinho and Christian Reynaldo is nice to watch and can be appreciated by even the casual soccer observer. The pin point accuracy of Beckham, Iniesta, or Xavi Hernandez is something to admire. But there is a second level of beauty that is overlooked. If you are a coach this second level is the kind of beauty you really want your players to obtain. Spain and Holland had this second beauty in truck loads and it is the major reason they were in the World Cup final. The first level of beauty has mainly to do with the ball—who is controlling it, dribbling it, shooting it, etc. Your most skilled players can bring many moments of pizzazz and entertainment. But they are brief and the excitement is fleeting. You could have a whole bunch of guys with flashy tricks and stunning acrobatics, but then you would merely have a circus show, you would not have a team. To appreciate this second level of beauty that I speak of, one has to closely pay attention to what players are doing off the ball.
As I watched the WC final my heart was flooded by the intense commitment, respect, and love that the players had for each other. Every player worked hard, but not for themselves, rather for their teammates. They were consistently in the spaces their teammates needed them to be. They made runs just to open the defense up and create space for another player. If a vital opportunity was missed or a shot went wide, I didn’t see players admonishing the attempt, sneering resentfully at their wonting teammate, rather I saw sympathetic disappointment, knowing that the failed attempt was mutually as important. They were 100% in it together. They must be unified when you consider the enormous pressure they are under. Outstanding squads such as the Spanish and Dutch, attain almost a marital level of co-dependency on the field. Their level of communication can match that of couples beyond twenty years of marriage. They know what the other is thinking. They envision simultaneously solutions to situations. They know which foot a teammate prefers to receive the ball. They know just how fast each other are. They count on each others’ support, defensively and offensively. The second level of beauty is the communal aspect of soccer. If you do not play well as a team, no matter how much talent you are stacked with, egos, selfishness, and pride can turn the beautiful game ugly. (France, for example.)
During the 2010 final, the slightest bit of selfishness I saw was on the pregame-face of Fernando Torres as he entered the stadium, knowing he would not start and may not even play at all. He is young, ambitious, and extremely talented. But the fact remained he was not ready. His prior injury still had him out of top form. It would take away from the team and Del Busque (the coach)knew that. When Fernando was played the last few minutes of the match he pulled a muscle. A little lessen that hopefully will serve him well as he has at least two world cups still obtainable in his career.
Coaches… respect, unity, and love are beautiful things. Orchestrate activities with behaviors that exemplify these principles and you will be giving your players a foundation toward the building of, not just a beautiful game, but a beautiful life.

Soccer Dad Pledge

My child is on the field to have fun and grow strong and healthy.
This time in their life is brief yet most important.
I must consistently be present with positive support, offering sound advice and plenty of encouragement.
I revel in their victories and bolster them through their defeats.
My example will be of self control and respect for all participants.
And I will allow them to learn unfettered by my approval.

by Robert Arista 2010

The last part of that pledge, "unfettered by my approval," is real important to understand. Letting your dad down is the worse feeling. Us dads easily forget how powerful our love is. Some of us think that our job is done with paying the bills or providing insurance and such. But our job is so much more. We hold the combination to the emotional vault. The love we hold in that vault is limitless and it can empower our children to be far more successful people than can our criticism and cynicism. Are you a dad that feels compelled to point out every mistake or display impatience with each shortcoming? Is your child the player that is constantly looking over at you after every poor play to see your frown or hear your complaint? Stop it! Shut up and enjoy the game! Perfectionism has no place in youth sports. Save it for resumes and covert military operations. My seventeen year old has never heard me yell a negative word in all his life while on the field, and he is well on his way to college ball. My point is... he is where he is at because I realized that he is way harder on himself than I could ever be. If he played poorly, he will tell me so himself. And it is then that we can analyze what should be done differently for the next game. If I have a question about a decision he made on the field, I will save it for the drive home. He has given me some pretty surprising answers. As he is playing, he doesn't need to to be worried about what I am thinking over on the sideline. He knows I'm proud of him no matter what. That is why he is a confident, self-assured kid.

What's a soccer dad?

A soccer dad is a real man that has at least one child playing soccer, and may also be the coach, the manager, the waterboy, the referee, the taxi driver, the lawn chair hauler, the net pitcher, ball shagger, cone collector, photographer/videographer, the check writer, or that guy who's putting up that expanding tent thing on the sideline over the players, cursing as he pinches his fingers in it.